In a normal, healthy pregnancy, intimacy, both sexual and emotional, can continue as it usually does in your relationship. Pregnancy does affect the situation, naturally. Here are some tips.

First Trimester (1-13 weeks)

  • ( 1-13 weeks): SOME women feel like, but most do not…
  • She may be nauseated or even vomit some
  • She may be tired and sleepy
  • Her breasts may be very sore
  • Certain smells and foods may make her worse
  • These things can make intimacy (and other normal functioning) a little difficult

Second Trimester (13-26 weeks)

  • This is usually the nicest 3 months!
  • Nausea usually gone, energy & appetite returns
  • She can often feel the baby move
  • Breast soreness should be gone
  • Increased blood supply, flow, and hormones can make sexual activity highly pleasurable for many women(…and she is not now worried about getting pregnant!)

Third Trimester (26-Birth)

  • She may be interested or not
  • She has gotten bigger- may or may not feel beautiful or sexy with her big round belly, and need reassurance
  • Backache, heartburn, and difficulty sleeping can come into play
  • Creative positioning is key to successful sex at this time; and yes, it may be comical!
  • Sexual intercourse helps her cervix soften and get ready for birth

Life Goes on After Baby Arrives

But it’s quite different, and has challenges. What an adjustment, for all of you!

Here are some thoughts from the staff of Loudoun Community Midwives– DADS!

Your wife/partner will need your support in many ways throughout her pregnancy, as well as labor and delivery. But once you are back home, your support role is equally as important as she adjusts to breastfeeding and being the food source for your baby.

Women who have support from their partners breastfeed their babies longer. And….
Breastfeeding a baby in the first year of life will save the family enough money for a major appliance!

The mama may have the food supply taken care of, but there are ways Dads can help her feel supported and confident. It can be exhausting to be the food source for a baby, so:

  • Encouraging her to keep up the good work & helping do tasks around the house so she can focus on breastfeeding can go a long way.
  • Never has a man unloading the dishwasher or folding a load of laundry looked so attractive!
  • Her milk supply will benefit from keeping hydrated, so bring her water and a comfortable pillow while breastfeeding.
  • She may want to try and pump some breast milk during the day, and you can help with a midnight feeding with the breast milk in a bottle.
  • Give her a break by bathing the baby, or helping make sure the diaper bag is stocked for your next outing.
  • Taking walks with your baby frequently, and reading to them is another great way to bond. Giving her a little time to herself will restore her energy, and allow you all to enjoy this very special time together!
  • For a first baby- DO take a class, one that she wants to take.
  • Let her ideas about the birth lead the way….she is the one who needs to do this job!
  • Great book: The Birth Partner, by Penny Simpkin